After Half the Florida Population Starves to Death, Governor DeSantis Suggests Reanimating the Dead as Workers

This post is from the Satire category.

Since the mass starvation caused by Florida’s ban on eating grain products that caused the state’s population to be nearly halved, numerous restabilization programs have been implemented in a desperate attempt to curb the damage. Most recently, Governor DeSantis made a statement yesterday mentioning a possible new program to replace the lost workforce.

Called the “Necromancy Labor Project,” this initiative would temporarily direct significant funding to certain scientific institutions for the research and development of technology to reanimate and control corpses. Although nothing is confirmed yet and not many details are known, DeSantis says the intention of the program is to aid the restabilization of the Florida economy by filling jobs that are currently unfilled due to the starvation.

Economists have begun analyzing what kind of effects this type of program could have, and whether it would be enough to recover from this dire situation. Since the original statement, the Governor has also briefly mentioned in an interview that it might be worth considering expanding the program after recovery by reanimating the dead to replace the jobs of the living, maximizing efficient revenue and making employment obsolete.

“It could also have the added benefit that, without jobs, many former workers would starve and die, which would increase the corpse supply.” ~ Governor Ron DeSantis